Blissed ones it’s been so long since we’ve had Questions and Answers! Sometimes I am pulled away by life but we are BACK! And it’s a good one…
I am 34 years old. I’ve been dating a man for about two years now and we recently moved in with each other. Before we lived together, I knew he was close with his mother. I was aware that they spoke multiple times a day and I knew that on weekends they would see movies or go out to dinner together. She is single, and getting older now and I thought it was sweet. Now that I live with him?? I’m over it! She’s over all the time. If they’re not on the phone they’re texting. They go to dinner, and then even though she lives nearby she sleeps over and stays for DAYS! Recently she did our laundry. All of his was folded and mine was left in a pile. WTF. They hold hands constantly when she’s around and she sits in the front seat when he drives and I’m thrown in the back! It’s ridiculous and I’m starting to look at him differently. He’s a wonderful man but cut the cord already right??? What do I do? I’m so un-attracted to him at this point. I think I want out but I’m 34 already and I want to be married!
It is a myth that the only dreaded mother in- law is the awful mean one who calls you the name of his ex and always sits you in a kid chair at dinner. (yes that happened to me) We also ALL dread the mother who still seems to be breastfeeding her grown ass son. And I don’t know about you but I don’t want the man who still seems to enjoy it. Unfortunately you only have two options here girlfriend… She is his mother. The bond between a mother and son is deeper than you could ever imagine, and these two have far surpassed the normal limits. Don’t even attempt to get in the middle of it. He may shake his head and act like he understands what you’re saying, but if he’s happy then all you’re going to become is the pain in his ass messing up all that good breast milk!
You can stay, and shut your mouth, and hope that time and maybe marriage and a baby will re-direct his attention. Or you can gracefully bow out and look for a man who realizes how strange it is to be a 34 year old man who walks holding his mother’s hand. If I were you, I would go for the later. Everyone has things they can and can’t deal with. CLEARLY this situation upsets you, but trying to get between the two and turn him against her will never work and it will leave you feeling unloved and an outsider. Sometimes there are great men that just aren’t great for us. Never stay in a bad situation because you are scared to be alone. You can feel just as lonely sitting in the backseat of your man’s car while his mother rubs his neck as he drives 🙂 Trust your gut honey… walk away and let those two be.
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